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[Entry 5] For the love of god, Don't eat the Falafel.

03 December 201008:37AMepic-triptravel

Hey! This post is really old. You should take it with a grain of salt.

Well, that's a little unfair. I don't know it was the falafel. But it makes a better title than 'for the love of god don't swim in the tap-water, crap- contaminated pool, and definitely don't swim lengths underwater'. But I got sick.

Not just Bali Belly sick (Egypt belly?). I mean honest to gods, shaking and sweats and vomiting and diahrhea and spending 5 hours in the hotel bed feeling like my limbs were on fire and my stomach was in an industrial-powered blender like Jamie Oliver uses and my brain contained an army of screaming toddlers armed with AK-47s who had just had their favourite toy taken away. I was talking to myself and tossing and turning and I even took a bath. And I never take baths.

Seriously, it was fricking intense.

As a result, I wasn't with Dad when he went to the market (No, he wasn't there, but cut him some slack- when he left it was just an upset stomach. And when he called to check how I was doing he grabbed his driver and came straight back.). I wasn't there when he explored the bazaar, or got ripped of by a snake oil dealer (literally, a guy who sold oils and perfumes, and this is a desert, I bet he did have snake oil somewhere). and bought this peppermint oil which I'm sniffing like a crack addict (it's amazing stuff), and had the most amazing Koshari with his driver in a restaurant which is smaller than our room (and our room is pretty damn small) But that's okay. We go back there with the package tour at the end when we get back to Cairo. It sounds amazing though.

Sole Proprietor: J. Random Egyptian, purveyor of Koshari in a most rapid, efficient and delicious fashion. Or so I'm told. :(

The oilery where Dad got ripped off. Or, 'upsold by an amazing salesman' as he likes to put it. Sure, Dad. Sure.

Speaking of the package tour, we meet the group tonight in the lobby. Dad reckons I should take it easy, but compared to 2 hours ago I could climb a fricking mountain. I'll go all pre-primary on you for a minute and say. I hope there will be somebody my age. I hope they won't all be old. I hope the guide will be nice. I hope we get in there and don't just cruise past on a boat/coach/sleeper train. I hope there will be other Aussies, and I hope there won't be too many Americans or Japanese, because they're the worst tourists - too loud and snap-happy respectively. (just my luck all of these will be wrong, but then again, I reckon today is my fair share of misfortune for one trip.)

Speaking of sleeper trains (I'm not (*on) a seque roll tinight, even iff my ttyping is a bit down the drain - seriously, the high you get after coming down from feeling that sick is like drugs. Or maybe that's the Panadol and antibiotic talking.), I should probably post our itinterary now that it's finalised (we booked flights to Florence - the last flying leg - last night).

stops to sniff some more oil - I need a hooker so I can snort that stuff of her chest (sorry Mum, it's the drugs talking.)

Right, Itinerary.

29/12 - Arrive Cairo (via Singapore and Dubai)

30/12 - 'Dead day' - tour not started.

1/12 - 'Dead day' - tour not started.

2/12 - 'Dead day' - tour not started.

3/12 - 'Dead day' - this is when you're supposed to arrive and get settled in. Official Day 1. (today)

4/12 - [Cairo] Memphis and Sakkara

5/12 - [Cairo] Pyramids and Museum. Sleeper train overnight

6/12 - [Luxor] Bazzaar and Karnak Temples. Start stay on Nile Cruise Boat.

7/12 - [Luxor] Valley of the Kings and Temple of Hatepshut. (somewhere on one of these days we'll book a hot air balloon flight over the Valley, if it's allowed.) Leave Luxor on boat.

8/12 - [In Denile (that's gonna get old fast)] - Edfu and Kom-Ombo.

9/12 - [Aswan] Temple on Philae, chillin' in Aswan.

10/12 - [Aswan] Abu Simbel (daytrip type thing by plane, at like 4am, since it's on the other side of Lake Nasser). Catch sleeper train back to Cairo at night.

11/12 - [Cairo] Kahn al-Khalili Bazaar (where Dad went today.), A mosque and a museum.

12/12 - [Cairo] Official End of Tour. 'Dead day'

13/12 - Flight to Florence, at 4am natch. (this is the one we just booked.)

14/12 to 28/12 - Hanging in Europe. First couple ofdays will be in Florence with Bertie (Ex-uncle slash family friend) Then we'll take the train (probably on a Eurail pass) up through Italy, through France, to arrive in Paris on around the 26th, give or take a few days.

29/12 - Hotel booked for Paris (we had to book this in advance, because of...)

30/12 - New Year in Paris, which is amazing. All the accomodation for today and yesterday is pre-booked months in advance, hence our booking... in... advance? Yeah.)

1/1/2011 - Leave Paris at 12:50 (pm, thank god), fly back to Cairo via Athens (I wish we had time to stop, but that's the nature of the beast unfortunately.) Incidentally, also the day I quit Facebook, so you'd better download all my photos before today!

2/1 - Depart Cairo at 1pm-ish.

3/1 - 6/1 - Staying with ex-neighbours slash family friends in Singapore. Funny story, we actually get there before them (morning vs. afternoon) so they're going to get the maid to let us in and give us rooms, one the ground floor and one on the 'first' floor, implying, rather scarily, that not only do they have a maid, they have more than two floors. And they used to live on the same street as us. Pretty shameful for us, actually.

6/1 (PM) - Arrive in Perth, at 2:40pm. Feel free to meet us at the airport and cheer us back in. And I'm only half kidding about that- if you've got nothing to do on the 6th, seriously do come out and see us. Just don't bitch about getting home.

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