"You know, I always worry about someone grabbing my bag when I sit here."
"You worry about someone grabbing your bag."
"What?"
"Nothing."
"No seriously, what?"
"It's nothing!"
"It's not nothing, you've been acting weird all evening. Is something wrong?"
"No nothing's wrong, it's fine."
"It's clearly not."
"No, it's fine, it's good, I promise."
"Just tell me."
"..."
"Seriously, just tell me."
"I have it."
"What? Coronavirus?"
"No! No, I have... it"
"I don't understand."
"The item."
"Huh?"
"That we ordered."
"What?"
"A few weeks ago?"
"..."
"..."
"Oh. OH!"
"Do you... do you want to see it?"
"Oh my god!"
"I think I should just give it to you. Here-"
"It's in a bag? Why is it in a bag?"
"You can take it out of the bag if you like."
"I... don't know if I can?"
"Do you want me to do it?"
"Yes? Maybe? I don't know!"
"I'll take it out of the bag."
"Oh my god, it's in a box. An actual box. Oh my god, sorry I wasn't expecting to have this reaction since we ordered it together but-"
"Do you want to put it on?"
"I don't think I can!"
"Do you want me to put it on for you?"
"...yes?"
"Hold on-"
"Oh my god it's real. Sorry, I just... Oh my god. I love you."
"I love you too."
And then they gave us free prosecco.